MCA #5, All Day Thursday

[electrocynic]

To recap, the last week or so in Sarah’s life:

First, three days more or less entirely spent in bed with her ex-boyfriend. Yes, the one who’d fucked off to be a hero in space a few years back. Yes, the one she had not been over ever since. That one. Guy Gardner, ginger bloody menace and royal pain in her heart.

Then, two days and slowly working on making it three spent... mostly in bed, but also on the couch. Alone. Except for a few tubs of ice cream and some now-empty bottles of beer. She hadn’t even bothered to get hammered. She knew that wouldn't actually do anything but make her even more miserable.

As if that was somehow possible.

So anyway, now day three of her moping was dragging on. Maybe tomorrow she'd actually go outside. But she wasn’t counting on it. Not when there was takeout.

[ooc: Open, and up way early because I have actual class today and phone-pinging is infinitely easier than phone-posting, omg.]

Comments

[suitably_heroic]

Atton found one. Eventually.

He joined her on the couch shortly afterwards. "Want to talk about it?"

That was an apology, too.

[electrocynic]

The one upside of the current mess was that she wasn't really hurting for an apology from him, anymore. Still, the gesture was appreciated. Possibly.

She was quiet for a long moment. Then she said, "Green fucking Lantern came back."

Not to be confused with the Green Lamp brand of ale from The Fortress. And no, she wasn't expecting him to know what the hell she was talking about. If she was going to share, she'd do it on her own terms.

[suitably_heroic]

"I'm going to guess that's some kind of 'cape name'," Atton said, fishing around his carton for some food.

[electrocynic]

Sarah rolled her eyes. At what, she couldn't say. "Guy Gardner," she said. "We dated."

That felt like an understatement. Yelling 'I don't have to care about your bloody war, because you broke my heart!' had been much closer to the core of the matter.

[suitably_heroic]

Atton took a bite, chewed it, then shot her a curious glance.

"Ah," he said, "One of those."

[electrocynic]

There was another long stretch of silence.

"Left 'bout two years ago." Her gaze stayed firmly down on the food. "A war in space. He's a fucking hero."

That was equal parts scorn and resignation. It wasn't like she didn't get it. Fuck, it wasn't like she wasn't proud. Neither thing protected her from the pathetically open wound pain of it all.

[suitably_heroic]

"Yeah," Atton said, leaning back against the couch. "I really hate the hero types, too."

Not, y'know, superheroes. But heroes. Those people. The 'going to a war in space to be a fucking hero' people.

[electrocynic]

"They can't be depended on to just fucking stay."

Never had she thought her relationship issue would be that the guy was too good a person to stay with her.

[suitably_heroic]

"'Course not," Atton said. "Big hero stuff to do somewhere else, right? They always have to find someone they can save."

[electrocynic]

"Fuck them," Sarah mumbled into her carton of food.

Good thing she was far too exhausted from the last couple of days to get into a crying jag in front of someone.

[suitably_heroic]

"Fuck them," Atton agreed. He sighed.

And then, fine, reached out to try and give her a bit of a hug. The sideways kind so neither of them had to move very much.

[electrocynic]

There was a small part of her that wanted to ask what the fuck he thought he was doing.

But this wasn't anywhere near being the most confusing thing this week. So instead of throwing it back in his face by questioning it, she leaned into it. At least briefly.

[suitably_heroic]

She looked like she needed a hug, okay? Space. It wasn't like Atton was the world's most comfortable with dealing with other people's strong emotions.

He patted her on the shoulder and let go, since she seemed all awkward about it and, well, awkward was not what he'd been aiming for.

[electrocynic]

And yet awkward was what he got. Look, he'd never come off as any kind of a hugger before, and she was feeling raw and ragged in a way that made her a little afraid to commit to a hug.

Also, she wasn't the world's most comfortable with her own emotions, which was of no help.

"Anyway," she said, "he's gone back to space. Think you already gathered that much."

[suitably_heroic]

Atton was starting to think he needed that juma right now. Sigh.

"Still more lives left to save?" he asked, returning his attention to his food.

[electrocynic]

"Guess so," Sarah muttered. She poked futilely at her food. Well, suppose it had been nice to have had an appetite for a moment. "Don't think that's a resource they ever run out of."

[suitably_heroic]

Atton let out a soft snort. "No," he agreed. "And no amount of explaining is going to take their minds off of it. The drive is that strong."

[electrocynic]

"I didn't even try," Sarah admitted, glancing away. Her lips twisted. "Well, no. Yelled at him a whole fucking lot the first time."

[suitably_heroic]

"And you're usually so calm and gentle," Atton joked.

[electrocynic]

"We used to yell at each other all the time."

That was not a thing that should have sounded mildly, vaguely fond. But then she probably wouldn't have been as wrecked as she was right now if Guy hadn't been such a great match for her.

[suitably_heroic]

Atton bit down on a Well that's healthy. Considering the way he and Meetra had occasionally thrown each other's war crimes in each other's faces, well.

"Think you made your point?"

[electrocynic]

Sarah and Guy had mostly thrown down repeatedly over whether children could or should be heroes. It was a weird thing.

She missed it.

"Yeah." She leaned forward and set her carton on the coffee table, on top of a pile of old issues of New Power Express. "Doesn't really matter, though, does it? My heart's still fucking broken."

Okay, between the shit week and the way they'd just screwed up something as simple as a hug, she was officially out of giving a fuck over whether that was something to state out loud.

[suitably_heroic]

"No, it doesn't matter."

It rarely did. If it ever did.

Atton put his own carton down, then pushed it further down the table with his boot.

[electrocynic]

Sarah put her elbows against her knees. Then her face in her hands.

It wasn't a crying thing, it was a 'God I'm exhausted' thing.

"This is so pathetic."

[suitably_heroic]

Atton threw her a little glance. "No," he said, "You're upright and eating a few days after this happened. That's not pathetic. Just figuring out how to cope again."